I never thought simplifying could be so difficult, exhausting and disappointing. I don’t know how many of you feel the same way.
I thought once the mechanisms were in place, it’d be easy to be on top of things. I was wrong, very wrong.
I started pairing down things, in hopes that once the physical clutter was gone, it would translate to reducing the mental clutter. Alas, the opposite is true! The mental clutter is proliferating, like bacteria on a moist dish sponge in a tropical climate. Please tell me this is normal. Please tell me it’s a rite of passage for all those trying to simplify life.
At the start of every the month, I draw out my budget and activity plans. At the end of every month, I almost always blow my budget, and achieve only half of what I had set out to achieve activity wise. Then I sit in my room, sulk for a prolonged period of time, and wonder how I managed to fail myself. I blame myself first, because it was me who couldn’t stick to the plan.
I have tried to troubleshoot the problem, and I’ve come up with the following possible reasons for my continued failure to stay on the path of simplification:
- My plans are unrealistic (I doubt it);
- I can’t say no even when I should (but I already catch myself saying no so often);
- I’m just a spoilt brat (HAHA).
I would like to believe it’s because I haven’t reconciled with the fact that the life I lead is a very comfortable one, and that most of the comforts I have enjoyed aren’t exactly essential. Although I have done away with so many frivolous things, there are some comforts which I have grown to accustomed to having, that I am unable to decline.
It must boil down to finding a balance between acceptable comforts, needs and luxurious wants. I think this is very unique to the person. Unfortunately, it would seem I have not found this balance.
The next few years are going to be tough (reference is being made to the looming event), and I want to be in the best form possible to tackle them head first with two feet firmly planted on the ground.